Before I started the MCBS Program, my life had been such a challenging adventure. From the time I was young, I struggled with self worth. I was picked on all throughout elementary school, and heavily bullied when I hit middle school. It got so bad, that I chose to be pulled out of public school and finished the remainder of Middle School and High School at home. The experiences I had with my peers my whole life caused me to struggle with various self destructive problems. Eating disorders, heavy drinking, and somewhere along the way (despite how I was raised), I formed a dependency on being in unhealthy relationships. I had always defined myself by who I was dating, and how much I meant to them. I was always jumping from minimum wage job to another dead end job, with no light at the end of the tunnel. I stupidly had mistaken infatuation for love when I met a man when I was 18, and decided to marry him and move far away, after only knowing him for 3 weeks. I wasn’t worried about my stability, I just figured he would take care of it for me.
When asked, I would say that I had always wanted to become a cosmetologist, a psychologist, or climb the corporate ladder and become the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company. I looked into attending beauty school, but my parents couldn’t afford to send me. Little did I know that the man I chose to marry had no interest in being financially stable, or even working for that matter. If I wanted to go to school, it would all be on me. But then, I realized that it wouldn't have been a wise decision to begin a journey and invest a bunch of time, effort, and money into a career that I wasn't even 100% positive I wanted to commit to. Besides, I had a family to provide for! So I decided to just cross my fingers that I could afford it some day, and keep working these dinky little jobs that offered no raises or promotions.
Three horrible years later, I had enough. I took a step back from my marriage, and came home for about 3 months to soul search. During that time, I realised that I needed to get away from that situation immediately. I had allowed this man to use me for money that he spent behind my back, degrade me on a daily basis, become physically aggressive with me, put my life in danger, be unfaithful to me, and still depend on his presence in my life. There I was, codependent on this toxic, horrible man, with thousands of dollars of debt piled high in my name, no emotional or financial stability, no friends, no family anywhere close, no career, completely on the verge of loosing my sanity. It was time to change. Bad. After that amazing period of self realisation, I slowly built up my confidence, and only returned to him to gather my belongings and say goodbye. That was the first most important decision I had ever made.
I quickly snapped out of playing the victim, and promised myself that I would never allow anyone to control my life, mind, heart, or body the way I always had in the past. I would constantly let the words of others sting me, and I never thought for one second that maybe, just maybe, they’re WRONG. I was in charge of my future, and I was the only person that was capable of turning everything around, because I was left with nothing but some clothes and my guitar. I had to start my entire life over. I was scared and exhausted from the consequences of my bad decisions, but I had never felt more confident in myself.
Once settled into home (and a near restraining order later), the waters finally calmed. It was time for a fresh slate! I had gotten a job at a coffee shop, reconnected with my old friends, as well as those I had met while visiting. Eventually, I found myself falling for one of my good friends. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that at the time. What would people think? Do I even want to date? Do I even deserve to be loved, I mean, I failed a friggin’ marriage? What if he’s just like the other ones? I had no idea what to do. But that newly found confidence and bad experiences came with a healthy dose of logic. That logic reminded me that the most important part of life is to simply be happy. So after much caution, I punched the whale and decided to simply just be happy. That was the second best decision I ever made. This man built me up, supported me, accepted my past, filled my life with positivity, helped me pick up all the broken pieces in my life, and actively encouraged me to pursue my passion and a better future.
By the time I was pretty much completely mentally healed, I had been working at the coffee shop for 2 years. It became frustrating because there was no raise, no promotion. Just working for nothing. Again. However, I knew that at 24 years old, it was time for me to do something for my future. Because of that, I pinpointed what is was that had initially drew me to all of those incredibly different careers I was once interested in: Cosmetology- Creativity and transforming something into a beautiful piece of art, Psychology- Intellectual thinking, discovering "why", and being able to dig deep into others' minds to learn different perspectives and behavioral reasoning, and CEO- Financial stability, organization, and leadership. My boyfriend caused me to get excited about going to school. He constantly reminded me that I was capable and worth having a great future. Even though I had separated myself from being dependant on a man’s opinion of me, it was just the boost I needed.
Because of that, I was inspired to explore different career options, until I found the one that meets all of those desires I have for my future. Because of that, I discovered Media Communications at my local Community College, while "shopping" for colleges; however I was not completely sold on attending community college, so I started searching for other options. The hard part was over, I finally figured out what I wanted to be when I grew up! But, lets be honest, I wanted to be taken a bit more seriously than a Community College graduate.
Until finally, after a lot of time researching the benefits of different degree programs, both local and online, and reaching out to all of them, I decided that Full Sail online was the best fit for me and my learning type. And ever since I decided to pursue my passion for Media Communications, I have realised that was the third best and most important decision I had ever made. I feel that this program was tailored for me, because it is challenging, engaging, interactive, focused, and MC encompasses everything I have a passion for, it fascinates me, and I love absolutely everything I have been learning so far. I have never been happier, more confident, more proud of myself, or more hopeful that I will be successful. I have been able to maintain all A’s (knock on wood), and I have no doubt that I deserve to be happy, I am capable of being successful, I am smart, I deserve healthy love, and a solid future in the fascinating world of Media Communications. Going to Full Sail helped connect the last misplaced pieces of my life, and turned everything around for the greater.
I chose to read Rebecca Aragon and Cory Sinnott’s MCBS stories. I was very compelled to be so open about that part of my past by reading what my classmates had shared. I found a common connection between us all, because neither of them really exactly knew what they wanted to do right off the bat either. They both had chosen their majors, thought they had figured it all out, but soon realised that neither of them were ultimately happy with what they chose to do. I can relate to thinking you’re pursuing the best option, but having to start again from square one. It takes a lot of courage and humility to up and change your whole future. I appreciate and admire both of these blogs, and I love that they were able to openly share their lives and their stories.
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